Friday 18 July 2008

Billy Crystal once said that "Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place."

Billy Crystal once said that "Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place." Although this may be a slight exaggeration, one cannot deny that attitudes towards sex differ hugely between the two sexes. How many people have you slept with? It's a risky question, isn't it? Especially for us ladies. It seems that while men boast about their conquests, we cower into a corner.GQ magazine recently warned its male readers that women sleep with ex-partners to avoid their number of sexual conquests going up. Is this true? Can you relate to this?Flair went on the road to find out.Charlie, a secretary in her late 20s, smiles at the suggestion. "I think girls would go back to an ex more for the safety angle than fear of topping up the conquest count. You know what you're going home to, you know they're not going to attack you and you know that they've seen you naked before so you don't have to ask them to turn the lights out before you take your clothes off!" A sense of the familiar seems to be a common theme among the girls interviewed. "It's so much easier going back to someone who you're already comfortable with. But you need to make sure that they know it's not a start to getting back together if that is not what you want," says Frances, a bank clerk in her mid-20s.
Grace, a school teacher, agrees; "I wouldn't say it was so my numbers don't go up, rather just because it's familiar, I guess ... although if you are having sex with your ex, it's probably a sign that you still like them with a little piece of your heart ..."This is an important point. Whether you are sleeping with your ex to avoid adding more notches to the bedpost or for a sense of what you know, it can be a risky business and emotions can run high. He may have a new girlfriend, in which case, he is cheating on her and you or you could start to have feelings for him again. Remember, there was a reason you split up. Jenny, an office assistant, asks an interesting question: "Should we always depend on what we know? A lot of times, having sex with an ex can complicate things or put you into a false sense of security. Is it really going to move you forward or just push you back?"
For Lia, GQ magazine got it right. "Of course girls do. It's ridiculous but it's still a social stigma for women to have slept with lots of guys. I have, and know many other girls that have slept with their ex's for precisely that reason."
Marciaagrees, "I have done it before so as not to add to my total number. I think that there are other reasons that have more strength in the decision of sleeping with an ex but it certainly is another aspect of the appeal, for me, anyway."

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